size 8 gladiator wedge
worn approximately 5 minutes
gel pads included
wtf was i thinking?
i mean what in the world would make me think i could possibly wear 4" heels (even though they were wedges) traipsing around the uneven streets of nyc in search of sustenance and then stand for hours on the hardest floor amongst all music venues? must've been all that tunisian myrrh i inhaled (jokes n jokes n spaghetti).
i had this dress in mind to wear to the j*davey show last night (yup, saw them again) but i wasn't completely satisfied with my choice of shoe. so i hit the mall in search of something better and left with the aforementioned pair of sandals. now i knew in my heart when i bought them that they were going to hurt. but they were so dang'on meOW i had to get them. i told myself, "self, just buy some footpads. you'll be gellin!" when i got back to my office i compared my two shoe choices (the 2nd choice being a pr of kitten heel metallic slides) and even emailed pics to my homeboy for his opinion. he said the wedges gave the outfit more edge* (no he's not gay...perhaps he should've been).
with that in mind my plan of action was as follows:
1 - buy gel pads to cushion balls of my feet
2 - keep flip flops in purse in case i don't make it
3 - if worse comes to worst, put on choice #2
and here's what happened:
1 - bought dr. scholls gel pads
2 - realized they don't really cushion the balls of my feet
3 - changed to flip flops while driving (DO NOT RECOMMEND)
4 - changed back to wedges at venue
5 - back straight, shoulders back, chest out (rawr)...walked with my homie to find food
5a - calves began to throb (ruh roh shaggy)
6 - noticed cabbies, truck drivers, and the like giving me the slack jawed ogle
7 - felt like a hooker, stinging sensation grew in the balls of my feet (MAY DAY, MAY DAY...WE'RE GOING DOWN)
8 - changed into flip flops on somebody's stoop
9 - found food (Rare Bar & Grill chicken burger DO RECOMMEND)
10 - eventually changed into slides and threw those godforsaken torture devices into my trunk
really i brought this on myself. i knew it wasn't gonna work but i wanted to believe! i'm gonna try some different gel pads that actually cushion the balls of my feet. if that doesn't work these chumpies are indeed for sale. i'm determined to conquer heels though. i'm a grown ass woman and i need to learn how to make them work for me.
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*don't NEVER EVER EVER take shoe advice from a man. they don't care about your comfort and they don't see you in the shoe -- they just see a foot in a shoe. and they probably see that foot in the shoe in the air, on the wall or over their shoulder.
5 comments:
At least you could have snapped a photo man..the shoes look good
HAAA! This post was hilarious, and made me wonder why it took about 15 years of wanting to cut my feet off at the end of the night, for me to finally have the good sense throw a pair of flip flops in my bag, lol.
The shoes were cute though, and J*Davey show-appropriate! :)
Love your blog
*dives back into lurker dungeon*
thanks, ultramag :)
come back and see us sometime!
tia they are ADORABLE. they look ridiculously painful though.
remember those green suede t-strap sandal chumpies i bought in spring? welllll, a season of sandals & flip flops (or is it just older age?) has encouraged my feet to spread wider. the shoes don't fit anymore. not like i could walk in them anyway. but i was tryna try. lol.
i don't remember any green suede joints but i'm sorry they don't fit no more :(
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